GOD IS NOT THE ONLY ONE WATCHING

...and that's how it's done. THAT'S how you live.

 And OF COURSE the owner of a place like this is named Cindy Gallop. What else would she be called, yuh know? Extra Fucking Credit.

I can't stress how much this place is blowing. my. mind. So glad I found it right on the cusp of renting my first apartment in Abu Dhabi and am thoroughly re-inspired. Speaking of my potential new home...dear readers, I am terrified. It's perfect. And I promise after today to never gush over it ever again until I am moving in because I'm afraid to jinx it. It's the cheapest and biggest studio I've seen in town so far. It's brand spanking new, includes water and electricity, has a huge window, HUGE white rooftop (say hello to better outfit of the day photos), 24 hour fitness centre with sauna, parking spot, 10 mins away from where I work and smack opposite some of my favourite hangouts (can already see myself rolling home at 4am). What's the catch? I'll have to pay a year's rent up front plus deposit and agency fees. So my mum and I are scraping up some serious cash right now, and this is exactly why even though I have a pretty badass fulltime job with matching salary (which I just received), I ate cup noodles for lunch today and will be serving drinks on my friend's boat this weekend for a measly 50 dirhams an hour. I can't remember if I told you about this friend - The English Russian? - He lives on a boat, has a diamond drilled into one of his canines and likes BDSM. He also offered to lend me some of the money. I politely refused though...

YEAH, I FIGURED OUT HOW TO MAKE MY PICTURES BIGGER. DADDY LIKEY!

[photos from The Selby]